WTF Wednesday #1

In an effort to post more consistently (loved this tip from one of your recent posts, An Historian About Town), I’ve decided to start an installment called, “WTF Wednesdays”. 

WTFW could be a rant about Target underwear (no way in hell those are XLs-try again), tirades on the topic of the price of a single cupcake these days, or just some of my random, seriously certifiable thoughts. 

This Wednesday I’d just like to share a screenshot of one of my house matches on MLS that I was just emailed. I really think it’ll just speak for itself: 


Except, I just gotta say…

Ain’t she a beauty? Condemned by the city and everything! I wasn’t going to mention the gorgeous rustic wood window coverings, the live in Cousin Eddie trailer, and the termite infested outdoor space, because I felt that was a little braggy. 

I know my budget is on the low end, but damn. 

If owning my own home means asbestos poisoning and ringworm, I think maybe I’m good? 

So, in ending, why would a property like this even be an option on MLS? If the city doesn’t even think it’s safe enough, why would anyone else? Also, don’t even try to sell me on the value of the property. Ain’t no way I’m buying land that’s sandwiched between the Clampetts’ compound and a serial killer’s favorite dumping ground.

Yeah, I’m good.

I’d love to hear some of your house-hunting horror stories. Entertain me in the comments! 

Author: fattymccupcakes

Just a thirty-something girl trying to love herself the way she is: fat, rolls, cellulite, and fabulousness.

58 thoughts on “WTF Wednesday #1”

  1. I can literally never leave this house if I want to stay in this town. Real estate prices here are absurd. So, every discussion the husband and I have about getting a bigger house involves us moving to some podunk town where there are no jobs and then we resign ourselves to the fact that we will live in a townhouse for the rest of our damn lives.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Okay, dumb question – what is MLS? Obviously it helps you find houses for sale, but what does it stand for?! I feel uneducated. I don’t know, I think you should consider it. It’s a beaut. Plus, it will give never-ending ideas for blog posts if you live your life in a shithole like that haha. I have the same issue as SickChristine – my area has grown SO MUCH and the prices have gone up astronomically, it would be impossible to find a new house in my area we could afford. We would have to move out of town. Which we plan to do anyways, but still. Fucking suburbs.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Actually, I have no idea what MLS stands for!! 😜 I just know it’s where my realtor sends me listings that match my criteria. I think we are going to have to update my criteria πŸ˜‚πŸ˜’. The housing and rental prices in my area are RIDICULOUS too. I don’t even think I’ll be buying a house any time soon. Obviously, what I can afford is BIG NO. It WOULD provide endless material for my blog, though…Hmmmm πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

      Liked by 1 person

      1. We got lucky buying our place. Located in our town. Walking distance to lots of places and big garden. You can’t get a garden like that usually. Things need doing to the house now… but rather that than Find a new one!

        Liked by 1 person

  3. My assumption would be they are expecting someone will want the land??? The house is priced too high in my opinion for it to be worth flipping… but land by itself can be awfully pricy sometimes! Either that or the owner is living in a dream world full of hopes of getting rich quick and finally getting that pony he always felt he deserved.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I’m so tired of renting, but I fear that will be the case for me as well πŸ‘Ž. But, it’s my fault that I chose a low-paying career. I’m sorry you’re having a bad day, but glad I could brighten it a little ☺️

      Like

  4. Well, we left the city and bought a small farm in 2000. We were looking for space and privacy, and to start a hobby farm, but we wanted a house that was at least habitable. You wouldn’t believe the places we saw during the hunt. Beautiful settings mind you, but houses that were nearly falling down, severely listing, one with no indoor plumbing, several that would’ve required eviction notices for the raccoons and/or possum, most required a mask and double-gloving just to tour. I’ll be damned if we didn’t buy one of those. It wasn’t in nearly as bad a shape as some we looked at, but had been vacant for roughly 5 years. Needed a new roof, HVAC, wallpaper stripped from every inch of wall, shag carpet of varying 70’s colors, including pink….in the bathroom, had to be removed, and 23 windows needed replacing. It had straw as insulation, we had snakes in the kitchen and attic, and even have had a raccoon in our duct work, staring at me through the floor vent at 2:00am. It was a chore, and still ongoing to some degree, but we love it. πŸ˜ƒ

    Liked by 1 person

      1. It’s a trip, let me tell ya’. But, yes, totally worth it. That pic you used in your post? Believe it or not, we looked at some that were in worse shape, basically it was the land that was the draw. But I didn’t want to tear the old house down and build new. Ours is 115 years old, and, hopefully, our stewardship will give it many more years to come. That said, I get not wanting to DIY. We didn’t have kids when we decided to do it. In the midst of all that reno, we had 3, one Autistic and then preemie twins. We likely wouldn’t have gone the route we did if we’d have known the munchkin situation was gonna go down as it did! Talk about a real DIY project! Holy crap. πŸ˜ƒ

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Oh sweet Jesus, this ‘house’ is a gem!!! Like you said, if it’s condemned by the city, how can it be sold?? I mean, we just got through building a house, and I’m pretty sure that every state requires a home inspection prior to moving in, and there’s no way in hell this place is gonna pass inspection.

    Since we ended up building, I sadly do not have any awesomely bad stories of MLS listings. Maybe I’ll start looking again just for giggles.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. LOL! Love the idea of WTF Wednesday!

    We flirted with the idea of home ownership years ago (have since become dedicated renters), and one WTF that comes to mind was visiting a house that seemed like it might be perfect for us. We saw it early spring, so the yard was drenched with melting snow, but we chalked it up to typical New England issues. However, when we saw the indoor swimming pool in the basement that even the realtor was unaware of… I mean, I swear there were waves hitting the top stairs… πŸ˜€

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Yeppers, and the realtor started in on a spiel about some condos she thought would work better for us (little did she know, hubby was very familiar with said condos, and how terrible they were). Rentals in New Hampshire are wicked pricey too, but we lucked out. Hope your forever home shows up soon!

        Liked by 1 person

  7. OK, I have actually bought…lemme think….five houses in my short (hahaha) life.

    First, this is a “short sale” – that means that the owner is upside-down in the mortgage, but if they sell the bank will take what it sells for and forgive the rest. BUT. Short sales take FOREVER. The name is a sarcasm lesson. The banks take offers for like 3 months – or more – and then they go back to the top few offers and ASK FOR MORE MONEY. And they don’t actually lose money until the house sells…so they are in ZERO hurry to close.

    My current residence was a short sale. It was structurally great but cosmetically…oof. The kitchen was COVERED in white-gray dust-grease AND the floor was a DIFFERENT COLOR when I cleaned it. And yes, we had the marigold dryer and mauve bathroom tiles with goldfish on them..

    I’m sure I have more stories. Like the house that had cats and no litter boxes…at least not that I could see (we did, however, see evidence that the cats weren’t exactly USED to using litter boxes….) oh and the house that had boarded windows, and as we were looking through it, we heard a BANG and footsteps….we think a homeless person fled. We were just glad we didn’t interrupt a drug deal….

    Liked by 1 person

    1. P.s. I saw so, so many dodgy places when we were looking to buy.
      In the end we found a place that we love, but it was pretty damn ugly before we re-did the kitchen, bathroom and all the floors. It took us a few years to save up to make it nice, but I didn’t mind too much because we could have a kitten.

      In the UK sometimes you can buy places from Housing Associations (this is what we did) so we bought 50% of the flat, and then paid rent on the other half. Can you do anything like that?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. It did for us! It’s a scheme for less-rich people like teachers/nurses etc. The rent half of the flat was super cheap, so we could afford to live in a much nicer area than if we bought 100% of the flat at once.

        After 4 years, we were in a better financial position, so we could buy the other 50%.

        Liked by 1 person

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