WTF Wednesdays #7: You Whore 

Ahh, blogging. Where do I even begin? I guess from the beginning. 

Way back, like seven years back, I started my first blog. It took a lot to get to the point where I finally hit “publish”. I sent writing samples off to my mom, who, obviously, said I was funny. I worried that she was biased, so she sent off my writing samples to colleagues and friends, never hinting at who I was. The response was incredibly positive and was the impetus to finally put myself out there for the world to read. 

Only, I had NO clue how to blog. Not one fucking iota. The only people who ever read my posts were close friends and family via Facebook and relentless “hints”. 

Not everyone and their halfwit brother had a blog then, so there weren’t articles all over social media about how to blog. I don’t think it was a “thing” then. I also think this was before the WordPress reader. Hashtags, Pinterest, and Twitter weren’t even in existence. It was the Blogging Stone Age. 

Pretty much no one outside of my small circle read my blog. 

What’s crazy is that I was OK with that. I was doing what I loved to do, and it didn’t really matter that I had to beg my ex to post supportive comments to make it look like I had a “following”. 

My second attempt at blogging has been a completely different experience. Completely. 

I’ll never forget the day I got my first “like” from a stranger via WordPress. 

What is this? Someone found my post? And, they read it? 

Wha??? 

From that point on, my following has steadily increased to numbers I never thought possible. 

I love being a “blogger”. Don’t get me wrong. My most favorite part of the blogging experience is connecting with people all over the world, from the United Kingdom to Kenya. That part is amazing and often the only reason I open my WordPress app. 

However, what I am finding to be a challenge is the ever-growing influence to whore myself out for followers, likes, shares, you name it. 

When I started Fatty McCupcakes, I promised myself that I wouldn’t get caught up in the inevitable obsession if all I focused on was how many likes I was getting. 

Don’t get me wrong, following your stats, managing your comments, and knowing what it takes to get your material in front of more readers is an important part of blogging.

But. 

After having an interesting conversation with my blogger bud, Charlotte, I discovered why all of the bullshit involved with blogging has been getting me down:

I’m first and foremost a writer

Blogging comes second to writing. Every.single.time. 

I’m not the kind of blogger who is solely in it for the potential money-making and free product opportunities. I’m definitely not one of those beauty/travel bloggers who seem to  always be jetting off to exotic locale after exotic locale, donning their free swag they got writing positive reviews. It’s just not my jam (I’m also not a ridiculously good-looking, independently wealthy, lucky bitch).

I have nothing against those kinds of bloggers. You do you, boo. If that’s your thing and you’re making money doing it, hell, maybe you’re smarter than I. 

However, some (as in, not all) of these bloggers don’t seem like “real” people. Even more, they don’t seem like writers. They seem to be computers that communicate (if at all) with their followers in a very sterile, impersonal way.  

How far can you fully engage in blogging until you’re a computer prostitute, begging for the opportunity to gain a follower, all just for the price of a risky blow job and a huge hit to your dignity? 

I don’t know about any of you, but there are some aspects of blogging that feel dirty to me. 


This leads me to the conundrum I’m in. Despite the fact that I don’t blog to actually blog, I do blog to gain more exposure. I want people to read what I write and to enjoy it and maybe, just maybe this will lead me to a paying gig at some point. 

I was recently introduced to Go Read, which is an online book club, but also a platform for authors to share their posts and articles. As an author, you have the opportunity to make money depending on clicks, shares and the like. I hear that many authors can make $250 plus a month. In order to get started, you pay a minimal fee of $25 and you have to buy a book and then you get to post. There are groups popping up that one can belong to where you share each other’s articles to up your payable shares. 

Maybe I’m being the dumbest, densest idiot on the block, but this just sounds like the not-good-kind of hustling and exactly the opposite of what I’m about as a writer. 

I’m not sure whether or not I’m ready to whore out my writing to boost my income. 

Tell me: Am I being stupid not taking advantage of an easy, albeit sleezy-feeling money-making opportunity? Do you ever feel like a blogging whore? Let me know in the comments. 

Author: fattymccupcakes

Just a thirty-something girl trying to love herself the way she is: fat, rolls, cellulite, and fabulousness.

73 thoughts on “WTF Wednesdays #7: You Whore ”

  1. I think anything that YOU have to pay for to be read may be a scam.
    I don’t feel like a blogging whore, but I’m winding up after the series I’m writing is finished to concentrate on an actual book – blogging takes up so much time, & I read many many other bloggers – & reblog lots – which also has its pitfalls as it’s construed as not having your own material. I disagree with that. If I read something I think is clever, or witty, or relevant, I reblog. It does everyone a favour. On the other hand, it’s only $25 to lose.
    AND YOUR SOUL …. jejejejejejejeee!

    Liked by 4 people

  2. I started blogging 5 months ago, I wrote something that I liked and published it. I must admit, I did think of the earnings opportunity and the thought of giving up work and doing something I like, but at the end of the day it is just a hobby. I would love to be discovered one day but I won’t compromise my writing style or go out of my way to chase followers because that’s not me… I’m just going to keep writing and not whore myself out and if it comes… it comes….. or just turn my blog into a book of short ridiculous stories and sell it .. ha ha

    Liked by 4 people

  3. I don’t bother at all with stats and likes or making money. My blog is basically a place to store things before my shit memory erases them, the readers and commenters I didn’t expect are an amazing added bonus that have actually helped my with life, running and all other kinds of advice/motivation. I don’t share my blog on any other platforms, I don’t even tell my friends or family that I blog! However, you are freaking hilarious and a great writeryour posts should be shared ALL OVER THE PLACE!!

    Liked by 4 people

    1. OMG, girl! You’re so sweet!! So many bloggers I’ve talked to have done the same as you-not shared with family or friends. I almost did the same thing, but said, “Eff it!” They will either hate me or love me, and I don’t care!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. There are some bloggers that only click like on my posts after I have clicked like on theirs and yes, that does make me feel dirty and like I ought to stop following them. But I don’t because I enjoy reading them. I don’t pay attention to stats now like I used to. Took me a few years to reach that point, but it feels good. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Yes, blogging is a disaster. I write to come to grips with my anxiety and obsessive tendencies. Each story I write helps me understand myself a little bit more. Then I post, and I become anxious and obsessive all over again. In fact, I’ll immediately start looking for a response to this comment. My blogging is supposed to be educational and entertaining for those who find it. I wish I could just stop worrying about how many people that is.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I think you have to be true to yourself – if you’re feeling like it’s a sketchy idea then maybe it is? I started blogging just to write, and while I sometimes slip into this dream land where I own a unicorn and a house hippo and I get paid to just sit and write, I know that I will probably never get there, so I just continue to write for me. It makes me happy, and that’s the most important thing.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Sistah!!!! Preach!! I just had this discussion with my husband the other day. I am not a blogger, I’m not really good at it, but I know I can write so I’ll focus on that and not stress myself about the other stuff. I just can’t promote stuff I don’t personally like. If you see me share stuff it’s solely because I genuinely loved it and wanted to spread the joy. I feel very fake if I do it any other way.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. YES!! I’m part of a blogger group on FB (are you in that same group?? 😜) I don’t share as much as others, because it feels so freaking fake for me to promote stuff I don’t personally relate to. However, some of the “bigger” bloggers seem to share it all. I just can’t. Sorry.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. I’ve grown tired of people taking hobbies and transforming them in to commercial enterprises. That would be the reason I could not be interested in it. I’m not knocking anyone that enjoys that site, but it smacks of an obsession with stats, something that I am not a huge fan of. The litcoins, and striving to get other people involved to make ‘them’ money, plus having to pay them for the privilege of making them money, just seems to off kilter for me.
    I agree with the comments here. All of you sound like your in it for the enjoyment of blogging, and not to be elite.
    I just want to share my thoughts with others and sometimes just myself. I would like to one day get where I don’t make the grammatical experts shudder as they read my posts. Sure, I would love to publish a book, or make money, but then I would feel more pressure to perform and raise the stats. I do it for enjoyment.
    Follow your instinct on this.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. My latest blog is still fairly new, but it’s inevitable I think, everyone eventually starts to think that way. Writers write because it’s fun and satisfying and I think it’s normal for a writer to engage in an internal debate on “whoring” themselves out. I’m still trying to get friends and family to read the words I piece together, so I haven’t quite got to the internal conflict yet. Likes and shares are amazing and I do a little dance when someone (someone I don’t know) enjoys a piece I’ve written. I also punch myself in the crotch every time I catch a published typo. As long as the love for the craft is genuine and you enjoy what your doing, whoring yourself out shouldn’t matter either way, if you don’t mind navigating through all the scammers and hustlers which is a full time job on its own.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You punch yourself in the crotch when you catch a typo!!! YES! That’s EXACTLY what it feels like when I catch a typo in one of my posts! I caught a really ridiculous typo in one of my blog TITLES and I was embarrassed for days! I am in total agreement on it being time consuming to avoid the fakes! So true.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. I don’t blog for money. I don’t blog for fame. I blog because I’ve got things in my head that need to go down on paper – or it’s electronic substitute.

    Yes, I do watch my stats. I like it when the little bell at the top of the WordPress page has a little orange dot, because it means I connected with someone.

    I’d hate to try to monetize my blog, because that would make it a job, instead of something fun to do to get stuff outta my head.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. I sometimes get caught up in the stats and forget why I’m doing this – to dump my brain contents every so often – NOT to make friends or make a buck. I’ve “met” some lovely people along the way though, and that’s just icing on the cake.
    As for self-promotion, it took me a year of blogging before I mentioned it on facebook to all but a handful of close friends. Most of my FB friends still don’t read my stuff – and that’s fine with me!
    There’s a lot of crap writing out there. It’s good to know that there are still some people out there who are serious about the craft like you are.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I’ll see numerous followers on likes on something awful. Meanwhile, I’m obsessing over a piece that I love and will only have a few people take a look.
        I know it shouldn’t bother me, but it’s like all the hype about some piece of drivel like 50 Shades of Grey. Hearing people say “Ooooo! It’s SO GOOD!” Seriously?! WTF is the world coming to?!
        (Sorry – getting off my soapbox now.) 🙂

        Liked by 2 people

      2. Dude, that crap makes me so angry! As a teacher, it makes me insane. Truly, our world is becoming more dumb by the day. It’s really, truly sad. Most people won’t take a second look at a post unless there are pretty pictures to look at. Their feeble brains can’t handle much more than that 😒

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you very much! I have never taken one of those courses. I didn’t even know they existed, but of course they do! It’s just another way some blogger is making their money-charging others to “hopefully” be like them one day. Oh, I’m just seeing now it’s free…Hmmm. I wonder what’s the catch? My advice would be to learn as you go. That’s what I did. Not to say it’s gotten me crazy far, but I feel I’ve learned a lot and not had to sell myself out. Good luck!

      Like

  12. *high five*

    I’ve been trying to walk the fine line between promotion and prostitution, and it seems to be working (although these hooker heels are killin’ me!).

    I fell away from blogging for a bit, but started up again in earnest a couple years ago, about the same time I began hosting a local writing group. It took me about a year (I think) to finally monetize my blog with Adsense, because it felt like I was selling out (and it took those local writers to convince me I was being silly). Funny though, it’s only been in the past six months, when we go around the table introducing ourselves, that I’ve added “blogger” to my blathering about my writing experience, because my (FINALLY) double digit average daily traffic makes it feel real.. 😛

    Liked by 1 person

      1. True dat. So far I’d like to think I’ve avoided the nastiest of the nasty. I always promised myself if I ever ended up in a dark alley, tweeting, “L4L” I’d check into the nearest rehab…

        Liked by 1 person

  13. As I work to promote my art and my book, I have this exact same feeling. It’s like one giant circlejerk. I post this artist’s work, and they post mine, but our followers are largely just other artists, who aren’t going to be buyers. Ditto on the book and the blog. That being said, if I have any hope of ever having someone stumble across my work that might be interested in buying it, I think it’s necessary to do what feels like nonsense. You never know what friend of the artist/blogger you’re swapping posts with might see your stuff and like it. Now off to join another clusterfuck.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. The answer is yes I feel that way. If you want the exposure your stuck tweeting, Instagramming, Facebooking, etc. I agree that often times responses are sterile to the point of patronizing. I can count on 1 hand the number of family and friends that know about my blog, not to mention I self host so I have to self promote even more.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ugh! Yes. I can always tell when the comment is done merely to be done. No thought behind it at all. On one hand, I get how time consuming it is to read and comment on all the blogs people follow, but on the other hand, I feel like you really shouldn’t comment unless you are ready to be real. Self promotion is a necessary evil, for sure 😬

      Liked by 1 person

  15. Yeah, pretty much all of this. I’m not looking for money, but sometimes I desperately want to be HEARD.

    I do pretty much zero promotion. I shared my link with a few friends, but I’m generally quasi-anonymous (I can be more honest if I’m not identified….)

    I have no idea what I want here. LOL Writing is good for me, and I do it on occasion. And that SHOULD be all to it, but it’s validating when people HEAR you.

    Ya know?

    Liked by 1 person

  16. We’re on the same page with this, my friend. I agree with everything you’ve said. It’s EXACTLY how I feel. I’m in it because I love writing & would love a paying gig at some point, but deplore whoring myself. Well said.

    Like

  17. I hadn’t heard of Go Read prior to this post, but from how you explain it, it sounds like a pyramid scheme!! Like you say, maybe I’m just not grasping the business model, but if everyone has to pay a fee and purchase a book, then gets paid by others doing the same, that sounds an awful lot like a pyramid scheme to me. It honestly sounds like the literary version of Plexus or Mary Kay or some such weight loss/beauty pyramid scheme out there.

    All that is to say, I totally agree with you, lady! I want my writing to earn readers based on the words I speak, not the dollars I spend. I totally understand that marketing does have to occur, so that’s not the issue I have. But I guess I feel like marketing crosses the line when it becomes buying followers or engaging in a pyramid scheme.

    Preach on!! Awesome post 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. YUP!! When I was told I had to pay a fee and buy something to start posting, it set the alarm bells ringing. Maybe I’m stupid, though. Maybe it’s worth it to engage in those things to make more money?! I’m not exactly in the highest paying career. Le sigh.

      Liked by 1 person

  18. I’m brand new to blogging (I’ve had empty husks of blogs before, but this is my first earnest attempt), and already I feel myself craving a “like” (like a magical lightbulb) or new followers.

    I can see myself already having to decide how I’m going to do things, and I agree, whoring oneself out isn’t the way. I’m a writer too. The soul of our work, or something like that, is what matters.

    Your post came at an opportune time for me. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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