Being a Blogger-Bitch Sesh

They have a point…


Source
When I decided to start my second blog, I promised myself that I wouldn’t get obsessed with followers and ‘likes’. I didn’t want it to be about that-the competive rat race to get as many ‘likes’ and followers as possible. Writing is my passion and I feel whole when I’m actively engaging in my passions. I don’t feel good being a how-many-people-are-following-me-whore. 
But, let’s be real. A huge part of blogging is attaining followers and garnering ‘likes’ on your blog and across all social media. The more ‘likes’ and shares the more your content is read. 

It’s just how it is. 

Part of growing a blog is giving as much, if not more, than you are receiving. Just like in a healthy relationship, it’s all about an organic balance between the give and take. 

Over the last, almost two years, I have developed relationships with amazing bloggers and people via WordPress. The talent out there is beautifully, abundantly full. It’s inspiring to read and interact with other blogs and bloggers. 

So, it really burns my bitchy biscuits when I spend my rare free time to interact with other bloggers’ content and they don’t reciprocate. 

Don’t.be.an.asshole.

It’s all about the give and take, people. If you want other bloggers to read your blog, read theirs. At the very least, give them a ‘like’. If you’re on the reader, it couldn’t be simpler to do this. 

Like, really. 

Another thing that kills me (since we’re being honest) is the amount of blogs out there that merely contain post after post of stock photos with quotes that may or may not belong to the blogger. 

These blogs sometimes get loads of attention. You stole content from someone else, and that’s what people ‘like’? 

Figures.

The bloggers I adore the most are those who you can tell spent time, energy, heart on what they post. 

I’m sharing some of my favorites, because it’s been too long since I last did this and these fabulous writers and bloggers deserve the attention and praise:

Charlotte Graham 

Kate 

No Love For Fatties

Stephanie 

When I Thought I Was Fat

I Will Not Live In Vain

Deb

The Revenge Wogger

Donkey Bytes

The Gay Stepdad 

Suzie Speaks 

The Shameful Sheep

Soul Gifts

I am so sorry if I forgot anyone. I went through my email and used the most recent posts from blogs I follow to find the blog addresses of the blogs above. Please let me know if we interact frequently on WordPress and I failed to list you here. I’ll make it up to you. 

Despite the hard work it is to gain legit followers, I think the hardest part of being a blogger is finding the balance between sharing your work on social media in a refrained it’s-cool-if-you-want-to-read-my-post-also-cool-if-you -don’t and being way too in everyone’s face about it. 

Because of this, I rarely remember to post on my Fatty McCupcakes Facebook page and Instagram. I do not want to be that person who people unfollow on every social media site for being way too overbearing and pushy. 

With that said, another one of my blogging annoyances is the lack of support from people you would think should be more supportive. 

I read an article awhile back about the struggles most budding writers face, and one of the biggest ones was the fact that you won’t always have the support of your close friends and family. Whether it’s because your content is disagreeable to the people you know, they don’t understand how to access your writing, or they simply don’t have the time or don’t care, it’s never fun to not be supported. 

I’m lucky that so many of my family and friends actively read my blog and support me in any way they can, but the absence of some makes me wonder. I know it shouldn’t matter, but it does. It does. 

I also wonder how I can have 400 some Facebook friends and not even 200 likes on my blog page. How hard is it to hit ‘like’? I’m not selling you something. I don’t bombard your feed with annoying, repetitive garbage. I don’t pester you for attention. 

So, what gives? 

These are just some of my personal struggles and annoyances that come with being a blogger. 

What are some of yours? I’d love to hear! 

 

Rant #4,352

What is blogging? I mean, seriously? What is it? I want someone to tell me. Someone of blogging authority (is there someone out there who could claim that title?) please stand up and enlighten me. 

When I first began blogging years ago, it was not the thing to do. Not everyone and their brother did it, and thus, no one outside of my Facebook friends list knew I even existed. This was OK. I actually just wanted to write. It worked.

Now, in this land of “LOOK AT ME”, blogging seems to be just another outlet for people who want to make a poorly constructed status update about what they ate for breakfast. Your bagel sandwich was beautifully photographed, but what kind of art are you trying to make? What are you trying to say? If it’s that you eat the most important meal of the day, I hate to break it to you, but you’re not the only who does that. Also, everyone photographs their food, so…

One of my main promises to myself, before I began blogging again, was that I wouldn’t get too hung up on the “likes”. I only wanted this blog to be about my passion: writing. I didn’t want to be a “like whore”. I have completely done the opposite. 

I’ve taken a brief hiatus due to this and my subsequent lack of inspiration. 

I read and follow so many beautiful, funny, and thought-provoking blogs that get maybe 5 likes, because one has to take the time out to actually read it. I know, in this instant-gratification-world, that’s A LOT to ask. Most people want a meme and a quick, poorly syntactically put-together blurb and it’s time to wipe. 

We all like funny memes, and quick, witty blurbs, I am the most guilty of this, but I look for those quick laughs on Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest.

We also all like to feel “liked”, looked up to, and admired, but does the high you feel when you get likes on your blog post outshine real-life accomplishments or recognition?  Does it mean more? If it does, what does that mean? I feel good when people like my posts because it makes me wonder if what I’m putting out there means something to someone else. It’s like putting feelers out there for fellow life. But. But, sometimes I feel that attention-whore part of me start creeping. She starts creeping. 

Is it all for the “likes”? Do you blog because you have natural talent? Do you do it for the attention? Why?

Further…

When I log onto WordPress, I want something to read. I want some meat. Some grit. I also want to write something meaningful to me. Something I spent time on. Something I mulled over. Something I spell-checked, because it was that important. 

Among all of the MEH out there is actual talent. I am glad that I have found some of these people and their blog posts that I devour like fluffy white cupcakes. They are so good. 

This world is getting more stupid by the second and part of my proof is the current world of online writing-blogging. It has become flooded with Facebook status updates and Instagram posts. Very, very few people on WordPress actually write and take the time to edit and revise. 

As a teacher, writer, and some-what intelligent person, I’m ashamed and scared of the world we are creating. 

End rant. 

Simply, Thank You

I was hoping to reblog the post When bloggers go MIA by Aunty Cath, but she must not have the “reblog” setting. I will share a screen shot of her post instead:

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I am extremely humbled and honored that I’m being recognized in other writer’s blogs. After doing this blogging thing for precisely 58 days (WordPress counts in days, I guess), I never would have thought I’d have the amount of followers and attention I have presently.

I am not entirely new to blogging. As many of my Facebook friends know, I started blogging when I moved to BFE, AKA Elko, way back in 2007. Saying it was hard for me to leave my friends, family, and favorite Cold Stone, is putting it mildly. I decided to write about the foibles of a “city girl” living in a cow town. It was met with loads of support from my loved ones, but I had not one “outside” follower. I didn’t really understand how to put myself “out there” or network at all. I wrote as a therapeutic way to handle my new life of falling into cattle guards and being held up on the main road by slow-as-molasses ranchers. It was a way to express myself, yes, but more so a way to remain sane. I miss that small, comfortable, infuriating town more than I can express (that’s a totally different story, though).

As mentioned, I had loyal followers who were close family and friends. Secretly, I wondered if they were so supportive merely because they loved me, not based on my literary merit. Sure, my mom laughed so hard she cried upon reading my posts, and my best friend said she “peed a little” while reading my writing, but was it really because I was good? I want to emphasize, that I, in no way, am discrediting the opinions and comments of loved ones, just sharing a little of my innate insecurity. One of my longtime loyal followers is a writer herself, so I suppose I didn’t need to feel too insecure.

I guess I always believed I wouldn’t be a “real writer” until I began garnering support from strangers. More importantly, from other writers. Most humbly, I have gotten an immense amount of support from the blog world. It was terrifying to put myself out there, in such a naked and real way, which was why I played like I didn’t care how many followers I got. So, in the case that I would totally fall on my face, I could brush it off like I wasn’t doing it for the attention. Now I sound like I really am doing it for the attention *back peddling*.

Let me be real, there is a delicious spark of electricity that runs up my spine, that creates a euphoric high as I start reeling in the “likes” and followers after posting. It’s addictive and probably as good as a cocaine high (notice how I said, “probably”?). I have been trying not to let myself get so wrapped up in the “likes” and the amount of followers. Yet, how does one get their writing seen without readers? Skating the fine line between blogging for the enjoyment versus the attention is treacherous, and I’m still learning how to keep my balance.

With all this said, I’m eternally grateful to my loyal, longtime followers, those who have been reading my work since Elko. I am also so excited for the connections I’m making in the blogging world. I get to read posts from people all the way from India to Australia. I am also very lucky that such a diverse group of people relate to the crazy topics I write about.

I have been told that I am not a real writer until I get a book published, and my ex couldn’t stand my humor, but you can’t win them all. I’m simply going to cherish the people who support me, and continue to write, and create. It’s all I can do. It’s all I must do.